I heard a man say he grew up in Church, he is fourty year's old and has been in church forty year's and nine month's.
I believe in The Man Jesus, God's only son, born on this planet, to be the only one to be able to bring us to God. I struggle so much in this flesh, so that must mean I don't have a personnal relationship with The Man Jesus and that's probably why I don't fit into Central Christian Church, I am of unequal yoke's for those people, I have not been to their church for a couple month's, nor have I wanted too just for that reason, when your shunned or made to feel like you have to prove your self, who want's to be in church?
I am working on a house, the owner got into some trouble with the law, and he feel's like a low life, I can not turn my back on this man as a friend, I can not judge this man as a friend, I am there for this man, I bailed this man out of jail, and signed to be responsible for him until his court date, I dare say there is not a single church person that would do that for me. Shame on us, Shame on the church, SHAME, SHAME, SHAME!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are right, I am making a statement about the church, but it is not without experience of their care, and I know they would turn it around and put it on me, and that's fine, I probably deserve that, but at the same time that's a fine welcome to our modern day church, and how , I say that again,AND HOW? HOW CAN I TAKE THIS FRIEND OF MINE, WHO IS FEELING LIKE A LOW LIFE TO A CHURCH WHO DOES'NT CARE FOR THEIR MEMBER'S?????????? That's a QUESTION?
Can you feel the frustration I am writing? I have often felt the Call of God in my heart, I had committed my talent's to the cause of helpping the orphane's in India, and then it turned on me faster than a skunk raising his butt.
Who are you God? Where are you? I have asked you into my heart, and I have been distracted by so many thing's and yet I can't count on your body of believer's to care, or get involved with, so who do I turn too, the people I used to run with?
So, Jesus, how do you deal with me? How will you show me the purpose for my life? I need to know, I am around real people each day who need to know how this work's for them too, If you won't show me, how will I be able to help my friend's in their time of need?
I DON'T JUST WANT TO GO TO CHURCH, I WANT TO BE A PART OF YOUR BODY, JESUS, THAT MEAN'S I NEED YOU TO SHOW UP, BECAUSE I AM LOOSING MY WAY HERE.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
In a clouded state of mind
Some time back when I was seventeen, I was taking flying lesson's in Alaska and learning to trust the instrument panel for what they are showing you when you can't see anything outside the cockpit. When your flying through the cloud's you don't look out the window's to get your bearings, you drop your head and watch the wings on the panel, you listen to the sound of the engine, you read the RPM's, air speed and so on, if you look out the window for just a second and then glance back at the alltitude, you may have dropped a couple hundred feet in that time period, you may also notice the horizontal wings tilted one way or the other, these things happen so fast when you take your eye's off the instruments, your equalibrium go'es haywire and your mind play's trick's on you.
In the end, when you come out of the cloud's it is refreshing to be able to look out over the horizon and establish eye contact with familure surroundings.
I got vertigo on one of these training flights one time and the only thing that corrected my mind was to look down at the instrument's.
When I am walking through every day living, I sometime's feel like I'm in a state of vertigo, my mind know's what right is, but my body won't perform the way I'm supposed too.
With all the health stuff going on all around me, and the accident's happenning to loved one's, I felt like I was flying with a training hood on, I knew how to fly the plane by watching the panel, but I wanted to see everything going on, and I was trying to do all the right thing's but my instructor was busy training someone else and couldn't hear me. I was doing nose dive's and just clearing mountain peaks, clipping tree top's and actually flying away from the direction I wanted to be headed in.
The training, and going back to my basic belief's, kept me from doing a nose dive. I have alway's believed in Angel's, my faith walk and all that stuff may not be in the greatest shape but I came back through the Angel's.
I believe I can call on the Heavenly Host's to come and perform what ever they do, and I believe they listen when they are called upon, from there on I don't understand how they do what they do, But I have seen the result's first hand, And I just want to thank them for going beyond their call of duty and slipping by me and touching me, giving me renewed courage to continue on. They have reconnected me to the instrument panel and brought me out of the cloud's and shown me the sun shinning above the cloud's.
They have done mighty glorious thing's, He is to be Praised and I know He is going to touch all my loved one's, He is going to bring healing to my loved one's, and comfort too.
As I get my equallibrium back, I want to sore again, Keep showing me the sign's and help me to trust the instrument's as I climb back in the plane.
In the end, when you come out of the cloud's it is refreshing to be able to look out over the horizon and establish eye contact with familure surroundings.
I got vertigo on one of these training flights one time and the only thing that corrected my mind was to look down at the instrument's.
When I am walking through every day living, I sometime's feel like I'm in a state of vertigo, my mind know's what right is, but my body won't perform the way I'm supposed too.
With all the health stuff going on all around me, and the accident's happenning to loved one's, I felt like I was flying with a training hood on, I knew how to fly the plane by watching the panel, but I wanted to see everything going on, and I was trying to do all the right thing's but my instructor was busy training someone else and couldn't hear me. I was doing nose dive's and just clearing mountain peaks, clipping tree top's and actually flying away from the direction I wanted to be headed in.
The training, and going back to my basic belief's, kept me from doing a nose dive. I have alway's believed in Angel's, my faith walk and all that stuff may not be in the greatest shape but I came back through the Angel's.
I believe I can call on the Heavenly Host's to come and perform what ever they do, and I believe they listen when they are called upon, from there on I don't understand how they do what they do, But I have seen the result's first hand, And I just want to thank them for going beyond their call of duty and slipping by me and touching me, giving me renewed courage to continue on. They have reconnected me to the instrument panel and brought me out of the cloud's and shown me the sun shinning above the cloud's.
They have done mighty glorious thing's, He is to be Praised and I know He is going to touch all my loved one's, He is going to bring healing to my loved one's, and comfort too.
As I get my equallibrium back, I want to sore again, Keep showing me the sign's and help me to trust the instrument's as I climb back in the plane.
Monday, February 9, 2009
When friendship's stick
My wife of thirtysix year's now, was standing talking to the preacher dude that married us, and he was literally standing there shaking his head in sheer amazement that we had out lasted his prediction of maybe making it a year, his wife explained to him, "this is one of the one's that "took".
Friendship should be this way too, we need to dispose of ourselve's and promote the friend, we should cancell out "me" and look to them.
Yes, Kathy and I did make it and we are "going all the way" because she is more than I am, with out a question more beautiful too.
I value my wife more than my life and would step infront of anything to protect her and would drop anything and go rescue her if need be, I will not talk bad of her, I would not strike her, I would not betray her, she is the most important thing in my life. My beloved FRIEND!
Jesus said to one of His disciple's"do you call me your FRIEND?" , And on my human term's, you see that's all I am capable of, But I will do everything in my power as a friend not to sell you out. I Love my friend's and have alway's tried to go the extra mile for both friend's and family.
I recently got betrayed by a friend, I am finding it a little more difficult than Jesus to be over looking of such treatment.
I however have another friend who has been reaching out to me for advice and guildence in some of his family matter's, this person needs me and I can't leave him danggling out there on the clothe's line when it's pouring down rain on him, I need to find an umbrella, a warm blanket and some socks that I warmed up in the dryer and go to him, now when he needs a friend.
I will keep honing my skills at friendship, I might not be the best at it but I will work hard at it! I belive if I do a little for my friend's then that's a little less that they have to do. I think that's the glue in friendship.
Friendship should be this way too, we need to dispose of ourselve's and promote the friend, we should cancell out "me" and look to them.
Yes, Kathy and I did make it and we are "going all the way" because she is more than I am, with out a question more beautiful too.
I value my wife more than my life and would step infront of anything to protect her and would drop anything and go rescue her if need be, I will not talk bad of her, I would not strike her, I would not betray her, she is the most important thing in my life. My beloved FRIEND!
Jesus said to one of His disciple's"do you call me your FRIEND?" , And on my human term's, you see that's all I am capable of, But I will do everything in my power as a friend not to sell you out. I Love my friend's and have alway's tried to go the extra mile for both friend's and family.
I recently got betrayed by a friend, I am finding it a little more difficult than Jesus to be over looking of such treatment.
I however have another friend who has been reaching out to me for advice and guildence in some of his family matter's, this person needs me and I can't leave him danggling out there on the clothe's line when it's pouring down rain on him, I need to find an umbrella, a warm blanket and some socks that I warmed up in the dryer and go to him, now when he needs a friend.
I will keep honing my skills at friendship, I might not be the best at it but I will work hard at it! I belive if I do a little for my friend's then that's a little less that they have to do. I think that's the glue in friendship.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
When Angel's Tend
There are thousands and tens of thousands of Angel's and the many miraculous things they have done, and many people have been touched by them.
It comes close to home for some of us that have been touched by His Angel's, And as I have watched and prayed for Kristina I have been blessed to have it re-affirmed to me in the belief of these Host's that quietly go about their business, how ever they do it?
I have had yet more prayer's answered because of my belief in The Heavenly being's as they have softly touched my heart in a way to make me look at my feeble waning faith,I think to myself and say it out loud,"Oh ye who wander so easily from your belief's".
I try to understand my inexplainable belief in Angel's, I know they come down to us, I know it's not without God's permission,as He send's them to and fro, to heal,mend and give new life, or give a poor soul fresh new air to breath as they were struggling to even inhale the slittest bit of air into their lungs.
I knew they came when in the sky the clouds billow and roll aside in the wake of their wings as they headed west to tend to Krissy, yes and to even tend to my short term faith.
Kristina stared stirring and moving as they swoopped into her room so quietly, and from that moment on her health started with little improvement's, with in day's talking, and then on to walking,yes doing these things that the doctor's said she may never do again, with in day's of doing that, Kristina is told, you may as well go home, there's more to do,but you can check out of the hospital. I belive the Angel's were standing in the room with the doctor's, gathered around holding hands and smiling at each other and giving God a "thumb's up" sign.
When Angel's were in my room and the doctor was looking at the picture of my heart, doc. said, thats funny, "I don't see the damage anymore."
I am eagerly watching Krissy's progress in full anticipation of glorious healing's, We have been shown the attendance of Angel's and the unbelieveable healing power of The blood of Jesus.
As much as I believe in The Tending Angel's , how can I find to surrender my Heart to God? "Oh ye of little faith!" Please tend to the wound's of my heart if you can spare a moment after your done with Krissy.
It comes close to home for some of us that have been touched by His Angel's, And as I have watched and prayed for Kristina I have been blessed to have it re-affirmed to me in the belief of these Host's that quietly go about their business, how ever they do it?
I have had yet more prayer's answered because of my belief in The Heavenly being's as they have softly touched my heart in a way to make me look at my feeble waning faith,I think to myself and say it out loud,"Oh ye who wander so easily from your belief's".
I try to understand my inexplainable belief in Angel's, I know they come down to us, I know it's not without God's permission,as He send's them to and fro, to heal,mend and give new life, or give a poor soul fresh new air to breath as they were struggling to even inhale the slittest bit of air into their lungs.
I knew they came when in the sky the clouds billow and roll aside in the wake of their wings as they headed west to tend to Krissy, yes and to even tend to my short term faith.
Kristina stared stirring and moving as they swoopped into her room so quietly, and from that moment on her health started with little improvement's, with in day's talking, and then on to walking,yes doing these things that the doctor's said she may never do again, with in day's of doing that, Kristina is told, you may as well go home, there's more to do,but you can check out of the hospital. I belive the Angel's were standing in the room with the doctor's, gathered around holding hands and smiling at each other and giving God a "thumb's up" sign.
When Angel's were in my room and the doctor was looking at the picture of my heart, doc. said, thats funny, "I don't see the damage anymore."
I am eagerly watching Krissy's progress in full anticipation of glorious healing's, We have been shown the attendance of Angel's and the unbelieveable healing power of The blood of Jesus.
As much as I believe in The Tending Angel's , how can I find to surrender my Heart to God? "Oh ye of little faith!" Please tend to the wound's of my heart if you can spare a moment after your done with Krissy.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Bhaa Bhaa Black Sheep
You automaticly know who this is going to be about, yes your's truely. For some reason God made me with that wandering heart and like the little courious lamb I get to taking to the dangerous spots to graze and end up down the cliff on my nose or flat on my butt, wondering why this happened to me!
While I am trying to regain my conscienceness from the fall, I am wondering, "am I not missing" from the rest of the flock? Surely they must notice by now? Doe's the sheppard not recognize me as one of his? There are no such things as sheep hustler's, so I didn't get wranggled by thieve's or have I, the sheppard wouldn't know and in my case he must not care. Sheppards don't make cliff call's anymore I guess! I know my wool is different than all the other sheep,mine's black and their's is white, this isolates me right out of the chute and when your a black sheep you get treated differently too, So I have been able to adapt to that and have had to become tougher skinned and baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaing, never helped. Once I find a way up this cliff, do I ram the next fence down and go out on my own and try to find another sheppard that will love me for my black wool? I know in my life time I have taken a few two by fours to the head, I don't know if I was a dumb sheep before being beat over the head or if it's because I was beat, I do know one thing, my head hurts big time and its confussed, like in a fog. Well maybe one of these days someone will sheer the wool and make me a buddist monk, least I wouldn't be a black sheep anymore.
While I am trying to regain my conscienceness from the fall, I am wondering, "am I not missing" from the rest of the flock? Surely they must notice by now? Doe's the sheppard not recognize me as one of his? There are no such things as sheep hustler's, so I didn't get wranggled by thieve's or have I, the sheppard wouldn't know and in my case he must not care. Sheppards don't make cliff call's anymore I guess! I know my wool is different than all the other sheep,mine's black and their's is white, this isolates me right out of the chute and when your a black sheep you get treated differently too, So I have been able to adapt to that and have had to become tougher skinned and baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaing, never helped. Once I find a way up this cliff, do I ram the next fence down and go out on my own and try to find another sheppard that will love me for my black wool? I know in my life time I have taken a few two by fours to the head, I don't know if I was a dumb sheep before being beat over the head or if it's because I was beat, I do know one thing, my head hurts big time and its confussed, like in a fog. Well maybe one of these days someone will sheer the wool and make me a buddist monk, least I wouldn't be a black sheep anymore.
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